The Secret to a Lasting Marriage: Embrace Imperfection

Even if it is not based on true story (I dont know), it stills an aspiring story to read. This story came through an email forwarded by my beloved sis. It has been in my mailbox for a while, until I could find the time to read it carefully, and it moved me. Good story is not for one's keeping, so here I share it with you the story.

When I was a little girl, my mom liked to make breakfast food for dinner every now and then. And I remember one night in particular when she had made breakfast after a long, hard day at work.

On that evening so long ago, my mom placed a plate of eggs, sausage, and extremely burned toast in front of my dad. I remember waiting to see if anyone noticed! Yet, all my dad did was reached for his toast, smiled at my mom, and asked me how my day was at school.

I don't remember what I told him that night, but I do remember watching him smear butter and jelly on that toast and eat every bite! When I got up from the table that evening, I remember hearing my mom apologize to my dad for burning the toast. And I'll never forget what he said: "Baby, I love burned toast."

Later that night, I went to kiss Daddy good night and I asked him if he really liked his toast burned. He wrapped me in his arms and said, "Debbie, your mommy put in a hard day at work today and she's real tired. And besides, a little burnt toast never hurt anyone!"

In bed that night, I thought about that scene at dinner...and the kindness my daddy showed my mom. To this day, it's a cherished memory from my childhood that I'll never forget. And it's one that came to mind just recently when Jack and I sat down to eat dinner.

I had arrived home late...as usual...and decided we would have breakfast food for dinner. Some things never change, I suppose! To my amazement, I found the ingredients I needed, and quickly began to cook eggs, turkey sausage, and buttered toast. Thinking I had things under control, I glanced through the mail for the day. It was only a few minutes later that I remembered that I had forgotten to take the toast out of the oven!

Now, had it been any other day -- and had we had more than two pieces of bread in the entire house -- I would have started all over. But it had been one of those days and I had just used up the last two pieces of bread. So burnt toast it was!

As I set the plate down in front of Jack, I waited for a comment about the toast. But all I got was a "Thank you!" I watched as he ate bite by bite, all the time waiting for some comment about the toast. But instead, all Jack said was, "Babe, this is great. Thanks for cooking tonight. I know you had a hard day."

As I took a bite of my charred toast that night, I thought about my mom and dad...how burnt toast hadn't been a deal-breaker for them. And I quietly thanked God for giving me a marriage where burnt toast wasn't a deal-breaker either! You know, life is full of imperfect things...and imperfect people.

I'm not the best housekeeper or cook. And you might be surprised to find out that Jack isn't the perfect husband! He likes to play his music too loud, he will always find a way to avoid yard work, and he watches far too many sports. Believe it or not, watching "Golf Academy" is not my idea of a great night at home! But somehow in the past 37 years Jack and I have learned to accept the imperfections in each other.

Over time, we have stopped trying to make each other in our own mold and have learned to celebrate our differences. You might say that we've learned to love each other for who we really are! For example, I like to take my time, I'm a perfectionist, and I'm even-tempered. I tend to work too much and sleep too little. Jack, on the other hand, is disciplined, studious, an early riser, and is a marketer's dream consumer. I count pennies and Jack could care less! Where he is strong, I am weak, and vice versa.

And while you might say that Jack and I are opposites, we're also very much alike. I can look at him and tell you what he's thinking. I can predict his actions before he finalizes his plans. On the other hand, he knows whether I'm troubled or not the moment I enter a room. We share the same goals. We love the same things. And we are still best friends. We've traveled through many valleys and enjoyed many mountaintops. And yet, at the same time, Jack and I must work every minute of every day to make this thing called "marriage" work!

What I've learned over the years is that learning to accept each other's faults - and choosing to celebrate each other's differences - is the one of the most important keys to creating a healthy, growing, and lasting marriage relationship. And that's my prayer for you today. That you will learn to take the good, the bad, and the ugly parts of your married life and lay them at the feet of GOD. Because in the end, He's the only One who will be able to give you a marriage where burnt toast isn't a deal-breaker! Have a great day! May God bless your marriage.

Do you ever think that we sometime take things for granted. Well... I do......

What it is like living in Brisbane?

I think it is about time I write something about our living in Brisbane. We have been here for exactly 3 months now. So far, we havent have the oppurtunity to travel outside Brisbane, the furthest place that we went is Toowoomba (it is an almost 2 hours journey.... it is another district in Queensland). The next furthest hahahha is Nerang, Gold Coast. To get our first car.


Brisbane is like hhmmmm hmmmm... I think PJ. That is the closest town that I can think of. What amazed me about this city and suburbs surrounding it, is how there were planned. Ok so you can say it is a modern city, everything is well planned. But if you go outskirt, where that place has been there since 18th century, you could see the same thing, the only thing missing are the skyscrapers. Atang explained to me, the westerners plan their city by establishing roads and streets first, then buildings. In Malaysia, roads and streets are built around houses. Overhere I really observe what 'iron grid' means. Go to googgle earth, and fly to Brisbane if you want to see what I mean.


Ok... I am not going to bla..bla... talking about town planning (it is not my position to compare, after all I only hold a CS degree)....hehehhe so lets talk about Brisbane. And so we live in St Lucia, another suburb in Brisbane. By car it only takes 15 minutes, after peak hours, to get to the city (not that Brisbane city congested like KL eventhough during peak hours). By public transport, bus or citycat (hey what's that..) it will takes about 15-20 minutes. Before I am pregnant, I usually take city cat to school, because there is a stop right outside the campus. But if I am going straight to the office (my office is outside the campus) I will take the 412 bus. My campus, QUT, is right in the city, situated at the Botanical Garden, near the Government house.

Want to know more about QUT, visit this link... http://www.qut.edu.au .... hehehehhehe...
Nice campus, I guess being an international student, you receive a lot of 'attention'. Hey my scholarship provider pay them AU$10,000 per semester, they better provide me with a lot of help. hahahhahhahahh Yup I like the environment, not just the place, but the people as well. So far I have received or should I say treated well. The staff are so professional, eventhough you are a student, and you ask stupid question. OK I should say QUT is a very condusive place for you to further your study. So I can say, I have come to the right place. Oh yes 1 more thing, Muslim association at QUT is very strong. We have a surau in the campus (here it is call mussolah). I even get a temporary prayer room in my office. And when ever there is a function, they would provide food not only vegan food but Halal as well (halal chicken sandwiches for instead). So yes, they are friendly to other religion as well. Here is a picture of QUT main entrance












I mentioned earlier that I used to take citycat to campus. Here is a picture of the citycat, taken from ourbrisbane website (www.ourbrisbane.com).... yes..it is a ferry... consession fare is $2.60 (daily ticket) ..... nice aaaaaa.... the river is named Brisbane river.










And here is another picture of citycat, taken from a far, in this picture you can see QUT on the right. This ferry already past the QUT citycat stop.







Here is another picture of Brisbane CBD at night, taken from a citycat. Nice ehhh..... All these pictures are taken from ourbrisbane site. Sorry still havent have the oppurtunity to take my camera for a ride....hahahhahahahha..... sampai aje terus sibuk ngan kuliah beb.......



1st semester just ended. I can start recharging my camera and take preety peektures of Brisbane soon. InsyaAllah.... I will stop now.... will continue other time, to write about our life here, which is so far is rather boring (hey I am studying here, not on sight seeing)..... So wait until I come up with something juicy yaaa... perhaps after our trip to gold coast..... perhaps....
......


Note: pictures taken from www.ourbrisbane.com

Mabuk..buka sebarang mabuk

As you can see, the header of this blog shows the pregnancy counter. If you dont, look up for awhile. Ahah.... yup... See that flowery colorful scale, with little numbers at the center of the flowers, and a giggling baby indicating the number of weeks I am now....yup... I am pregnant. Hey we couldnt believe it either, when we first found out about it.

So, my period was 1 week late. But I assumed it is because of the stressed that I am experiencing. Plus I did had some spotting. But I noticed that if I stood up long, I felt dizzy. Curious, we bought the pregnancy test (boy it is expensive here). Two days in the row, the result came up positive. So on Monday, May 21st, I made an appointment with Dr Rhian Kedrick, a GP at QUT Health Centre, and after the UTP, I was confirm pregnant. We are so happy. We have waited 4 years for this. Of course we are happy.

We immediately sent this wonderful news to along and abang, called up mak and abah, ayah n mak, atang's siblings, and not forgetting close friends, baya, gee, syaimak, mas, june, hana... oh yes... our brisbane friends haliza (actually she was the first one we bumped into after seeing the Dr Rhian... bet she would be hysterical if she knew about this), azlin, and azlin told sabrina and maya about this.

This week is so teruk..... all the time rasa mabuk.... nak baring aje rasa... Nak makan tak lalu, tak bleh makan nasik... Nak masak pun kena pikir panjang, apa yg boleh dimasak n dimakan. When I was pregnant with yaya, we lived with my parents, so manja la sikit.... tak masuk dapur pun in the first trimester. Tak bleh bau wap nasik, minyak masak. Now still much the same. But I dont have any choice but to cook. Kalau kat mesia, bleh la tapau aje... sini nak tapau kat mane kan....
Anyway... everything has it purpose. I still need to go through this. Minta kekuatan dari Allah swt.

So friends... please pray for me ya. Pray for my health and this baby health too. Pray for my success as well. I hope this sickness wont last long. Luckily it is the end of the semester.